What I’m about to tell you is going to make me so irresistible to you, you’re going to want to smash through your computer screen just to kiss me. Maybe. Folks, I have flaky lips and it is horrible. This isn’t just a winter thing it is an all year round sexy treat for my face. Nice huh? I’ve tried scrubbing them with an old toothbrush but my lips must be super fine because even the most gentle of touch with the toothbrush makes them bleed. I struggle getting lipstick to glide on because of it and it damn well looks a dry old ‘orrible mess. I want to wear bright lipstick colours and not look like my lips have a disease, damn it. So I looked into it and it turns out I’m not alone, lots of people have revolting lips too. Hurrah! Let’s form a union. Cosmetics companies are putting out lip scrubs and another such gubbins so we too can have super smooth lips, how nice of them. Only I’m not really prepared to pay lots of money for these products. So I made my own.
HOW TO MAKE YOUR OWN LEMON LIP SCRUB
What you will need:
Juice of 1/2 a lemon
100g soft brown sugar
1. Put the half soft brown sugar into a bowl slowly add enough honey to mix into a firm paste – almost so it comes together in chunks.
2. Then pour in olive oil bit by bit until reaches a thin but not runny consistency.
3. Add the lemon juice and mix in very well.
4. Finish by adding the remainder of brown sugar and stirring until the paste is almost hummus like in consistency. Add more honey or oil if you feel the mixture needs it, just make sure it isn’t sloppy. You can then pack the scrub into a small leftover pot or tin and pop in the fridge to keep it fresh. The brown sugar is just rough enough to rub off the dry skin without damaging your lips, the lemon prevents infections and the oil and honey soften your lips into kissable submission.
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P.S. I’ve managed to put my neck out, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. So MUCH pain. Hence the slightly crazed look in the above photo.